Resting in HIS Presence

I don’t know how to exactly say this so I am just going to come out and say it…I’m going to be taking a momentary break from my blog. I’m not sure yet for how long but I think it’ll be made clear to me when I’m supposed to come back, at least that’s what I’m trusting.

I’ve felt a strong strong push today from God telling me to leave the blog be for at least a few days and to walk with him and talk with him and let him heal me and turn to him through this grieving process. I’ve prayed about it throughout the whole day and that’s what I keep hearing, no matter how much I want to hear otherwise. So this is my last post for a bit.

My friend has been telling me off and on to rest or to rest in his presence. I wasn’t sure how to do that and the words have been reverberating through my mind, especially the last few days. I kept asking God what does that mean? Today I got my answer, and no I wasn’t exactly ready for it. It surely was not my idea to leave behind momentarily my safety net and my place where I let out my inner feelings. But you know what? I woke up this morning feeling like I had been run over by a truck and I wasn’t sure how I was going to make it through the day especially a work day…I just felt so drained physically, emotionally, and mentally. So I gave up control, prayer, and asked God…how do I rest in your presence, I am so so tired! He told me to leave the blog be and come with him. Am I scared? Yes! Am I anxious? Yes! Do I feel like I might vomit from nerves? Yes!

But it’s about taking that leap of faith. Trusting that he knows what he is doing and that he has a plan for me. I am CHOSEN and I can choose to either listen to what he is saying and obey or I can turn my back. I am taking the leap my friends.

I’m going to especially fill the time I would normally spend writing on here with prayer, journaling, reading his words, talking to him, and doing whatever I feel like he is leading me to do. It’s not comfortable but most of the time growing in your faith isn’t comfortable.

For anyone worried about my grief, don’t worry…he’s got me and his arms wrapped around me and everything is going to be okay. This isn’t me running away from my feelings like in the past. This is me running towards him saying “I’m broken, heal me, show me the way, teach me how to grieve, take me where I’m supposed to be.” Here I am God, I am yours. He’s placed great friends and people in my life that will keep me accountable, check on me, and help me through the process as well. As I said before, You Don’t have to do this alone; let people love you, help you, pray for you, and speak his truth to you. I’m also going to be going to a bible study and I think that will help me as well, I’m very excited about it. And don’t worry, I’ve learned how to ask for help, prayers, and comfort from people when I need it or when I’m not feeling okay. I just feel that instead of using my blog as my outlet through at least the beginning of this process, he wants me to use him. He has things he wants to show me, teach me, and he wants to heal me. I personally know my grieving process in the past has not been the healthiest thing and I was actually planning blogging about that tonight until all of this came around. But maybe that’s a post to come after this…after he shows me what healthy grieving looks like and how to do it healthily.

So that’s where I’ll be, I’ll be resting in his presence and letting him show me the way. I’m trusting that I’ll come back changed, healed, and restored.

Love and prayers to all of you my sweet friends 🙏🏻🥰❤️. See you on the other side.