Healthy Healing

I’m back! I officially stayed away from my blog for longer than a week…and guess what? It was so worth it.

God absolutely knew I needed him and he healed me and was with me in my time of need. It was so good! HE is so good!

In the past when I have gone through rough things, I have not exactly sought out healthy avenues of healing… and no I’m not talking about drugs or alcohol. Running specifically has been unhealthy for me. Which I’m sure some people are wondering how is running unhealthy? Isn’t running good for you? Well it’s not when you turn to running as an outlet and as a way to deal with pain instead of seeking God or finding someone to talk things through with. Does bilateral femoral stress fractures sound like a healthy thing? For non-medical people…I had stress fractures at the same time in both legs in the longest and “strongest” bone in your body. How did that happen? Literally running myself into the ground. Even when my body was telling me to quit…I kept on going.

That was 10 years ago and I’ve come a long way since then. After all of that, I had to take quite a bit of time off of running and while it was really hard at first since that was my outlet…I re-established myself and changed my ways. I now have a healthy relationship with running and have even run 2 half marathons the past two years and have been perfectly fine. The difference? Running is no longer my outlet. Part of it is because I am aware of my past failures. So now, when I go through something bad, I keep watch on myself, hold myself accountable and don’t let myself stray down those same paths. Have I gone running since my step-grandma died? Yes…once. But the intentions were different; I didn’t seek running to mask my pain or to hide my feelings, it was for an endorphin release and to get some exercise.

I turned to God this time for healing. I listened to worship music, prayed my little heart out, and buried myself in HIS word, and shared my life and troubles with other believers. Guess what? It got better. Each day it got better. Each day I felt a little more energy, a little more healed, and a little more back to normal. It wasn’t entirely easy either and times got dark, but I stayed with it and I was victorious. The whole entire time the enemy was trying to get me. People were dying left and right at my work (terminally ill patients) which did not make things any easier. It would have been so easy to let the enemy take a hold of me. But I didn’t, I fought through it, prayed harder to God, and soaked up scripture. I even read the Book of Acts in one night…not entirely by accident as my bible study group is currently studying Acts, but I got started and I just couldn’t stop.

The more I live my life for Jesus and the more I trust in God’s plan for my life; the better I feel. I no longer feel empty; I feel like I have a greater purpose. I do not have all the answers, but I can tell you that God is working in my life. The more I talk to him and the more time I spend with him, the more he talks to me…and it is AMAZING.

He is the light in the dark. He will not forsake us and he is always with us.

John 8:12: Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

Prayers and love you all of you my sweet friends 😘🙏🏻.