I’ve been meaning to write about this for awhile but have more so just been waiting until my thoughts were clear enough to write them down and the post keeps evolving as time goes on and as I grow more.
Before my husband and I moved/started looking for a house I had promised myself that once we moved I would stop making excuses and would start doing the following 4 things:
1. Working on my relationship with God.
2. Cooking, cleaning, and helping around the house more.
3. Being a better wife.
4. Getting myself back in shape.
None of those things really have anything to do with getting a house…but I needed a start point and I guess getting a house seemed like the start of a new chapter.
The most important out of those 4 things was working on my relationship with God and that started before we got the house. Initially unknowingly to myself, God was guiding me and putting the right people in my life.
Crazy story time…
How do you find a realtor? Well if you’re me who is a very methodical person who does their research…you search the internet, read reviews, ask around, etc and compile a list of people. Except…I didn’t do that…which is so unlike me.
A few weeks before our wedding, my husband and I were driving around looking at houses and we found this one we really liked. We pulled in the driveway and instead of looking the house up on Zillow like we had with most other houses, we decided to call the realtor whose number was on the sign.
The realtor answered and told us that the house we were looking at was unfortunately under contract but she would let us know if it fell through. I think we gave her our email addresses or something but that was pretty much it until after the wedding.
Post wedding and honeymoon we start looking at houses again. We find this house on realtor.com literally at 9-10 pm that looked absolutely perfect and for the price it was a steal. Instead of researching realtors and what not, my husband and I both knew we had wanted to call the realtor we had talked to before the wedding. I can’t explain but we both didn’t doubt it…our only dilemma was whether or not it was too late at night to call.
We ended up calling her because real estate can be a hot commodity and sometimes houses sell instantly. She answered and said she would be happy to show us the house the next day. The only problem was my husband had class. So I decided to meet her at the house alone…which again is not something I would normally do. I would normally meet the person and make sure everything checked out. Anyway we meet at the house and the house was totally quirky…hence the great price. Even though the house didn’t work out, I was sold on the realtor. After meeting her in person, she was so sweet and genuine and I knew we just had to stick with her!
After many showings, placing an offer, the seller selling the house out from underneath us, finding a different house, placing another offer, having the offer accepted, and finally closing; we formed a friendship.
Through our friendship, we have opened up to each other about different things and I told her about some of my struggles with faith and my life. I’ve also told her about my desire to find a church and continue growing in my faith.
Then comes this morning…
My friends were in town for the weekend and I thought that they weren’t going to be leaving until this afternoon so I didn’t think I would be able to try out a church this weekend. They ended up having to get back to where they are from, and so they left right after breakfast. Last night, I had written down the service times of all of the churches on my list and I figured if they left and I had time to go, that I would pick one that had a service time I could catch before I headed back home.
My friends left and I was sitting in my car, I felt lead to text my realtor friend. I can’t explain it, but it felt like I should text her…so I did. I asked her if she had any recommendations on churches in the area because I was in the town she lives in for breakfast. It was right before 10, and I told myself there was no way she was going to respond because surely she would already be at church and not focused on looking at her phone. Again, I felt led…to sit in my car a few minutes before starting to drive home. I wait a few minutes and don’t hear anything so I start to drive home. A few minutes later, she texts me and tells me to come try her church which happens to be just off of the road I was driving on.
So I went. People she introduced me to seemed genuinely excited I was there…which a weird but very nice feeling because I haven’t felt that in awhile and that’s part of the reason I had been afraid to go to church.
Worship starts and it takes me a little bit to get into it. Partially because I am very self conscious about singing and letting the spirit move me. The whole time I was growing up, all people ever told me was that I couldn’t sing, dance, and didn’t have any rhythm so it has always been hard for me to completely let go and do those things in front of people even though I am dying inside to do them. Anyway, I finally stopped mostly caring and let myself sing, move, and feel the presence of God and it was incredible. I am still a work in progress and it is going to take me a little bit to get over those feelings of people judging my singing, etc but I’m really working on it.
Then there was the message. The message was on 1 Peter and the pastor read straight from the Bible which he said was a first for him but he felt led to do it. I didn’t bring my Bible…well because I wasn’t sure how this morning was going to play out since my friends were in town…but yay for iphone apps! So I opened my Bible app and started highlighting things that spoke to me and how crazy was it that it was some of the very things I’ve been thinking about lately?
“In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.” Amen to that! Our suffering and our trials are worth it for our end destination.
“Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy.” The concept of not being able to see our touch God has always been something I’ve struggled with. It is much easier for me to believe in things that I can see and touch. But that’s where faith comes in. And ever since I’ve been trusting God and letting him work in my life and guide me to where I’m supposed to be…I’ve been extremely joyous. Am I still human? Yes. Am I rays of sunshine all the time? No. But my heart feels fuller and overall I feel happier.
“Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.” Love the family of believers…amen. God speaks to us through other believers and puts people in our lives to guide us, share life with us, and go through trials and tribulations with.
“For you were like sheep going astray,” but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.” I was mostly definitely the astray sheep…lost, broken, unfulfilled. But I am finding hope and life in our Father and am headed where I’m supposed to be.
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” This I just think is important for us all to keep in mind. It is hard for us to not be vain in get caught up in the clothes we wear, the way we look, etc. but those are not the things that truly matter. It’s our hearts and our spirits. When you think about it we don’t love our spouses or friends because they wear certain clothes…we love their spirit, their heart, their inner soul.
“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” This one can be hard. When someone wrongs or insults us, it can be hard to not say mean things back. However when someone insults you, and you bless them instead, it catches them off guard and can really soften and touch people. Sometimes people are fighting battles we know nothing about…so be kind and gentle.
I could go on and on with these. But these are just a few of the things I highlighted this morning.
After the service. My friend and I ended up talking. I ended up telling her some stuff that had been weighing on my heart and that I felt led to share even things I don’t really tell anyone else. After I told her some things, she said she could sense shame. I had never thought of it, but she was so right. I hit myself over the head with everything I have ever done wrong, and as she said, God has already forgiven me and he loves me. Then she said, you need to let yourself off the hook. Which is true, I need to forgive myself and move on. God has forgiven me and by not forgiving myself and letting my wrongdoings and burdens go, I am only holding myself back. Her words spoke such truth into me and was exactly what I needed to hear even though I didn’t know it was what I needed to hear.
God has a plan y’all. When you are faithful and follow him and let him have control, you will reach heights that you never thought you would reach. Today was a blessing to me on so many levels and I’m so thankful I listened and followed what I felt led to do and thankful for my realtor now friend for speaking truth to me. We can’t do it alone. That’s why we are a family of believers and that’s why God places good people in our lives to help guide us, love us, and help us live his truth.
An answered prayer for sure. I’ve been praying to God to put and keep the right people in my life and for him to lead me to where I’m supposed to be.
“Journey to God starts with one small step at a time. He doesn’t expect you to run the mile–but HE promises you the strength to go the distance.”
May God be with you all this week.
Leave No Words Left Unwritten 